Hello Again, Old Friend.

It's been nearly a year since I last blogged.

Life got busy.

I felt guilty and ashamed for gaining so much weight back.

I have actually gained all but 14 pounds back since my lowest weight - which was in February of 2011, I think. Nearly three years ago.

That's a lot of weight to lose and gain in four years.

Those of you familiar with this blog know most of the story; since this last February (my last post), I added switching from part-time to full-time, then adding a second job to make my work week closer to 50 hours than 40. We also moved again (only next door to where we were living before). Throw in some typical and not-so-typical life drama - and I guess you get rapid weight gain.

I could tell you that I'm only discouraged. That I am simply worn down with my own self-loathing. I could tell you that I am desperate to lose the weight.

I could tell you that all I do is look at Facebook profiles of beautiful friends and envy every photo. I could tell you that I will never again, after this moment, eat bad food, overeat, and skip exercise.

However, that would not be accurate.

The truth is, this last year has been hard in many ways, but really good, too. My focus right now is not on the crap, but on the blessings.

I have done a little bit of all the things I mentioned above, but I'm not consumed by this weight gain (anymore). God has moved me on when I haven't been able to do it myself.

In fact, God has provided in ways I'm sure I will never fully understand.

So what's next?

Well, I started Weight Watchers online again.

I currently weigh 232.2

Still 5' 2"

For five weeks I walked on the treadmill for 30 minutes, 3-5 times each week. Then I had three weeks in there where I went on vacation, had Thanksgiving, and got a bit off track. But I'm back on track now. Up early to walk before I leave for work.

I've missed you all out there who joined me before. Hope to hear from some of you again. How are you doing?

All the best,
Nicole